Illegal Immigrant CH23 - Check-up

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Recalcitrant as ever, Dawn just isn’t listening to the good advice she is being given. All of this should be leading to an LPS intervention…. While Katherine and James will get her back eventually what Dawn needs right now is a massive reality check from a no nonsense foster mom.

As this story is set in the DD where Dawn is a little I’m also perplexed as to why the Mom (Katherine) would also end up in diapers, especially when Katherine is now the person who is changing Dawn’s diapers. If Dawn had been a Mom on the tour with her kids and they had been taken then yes, because she was still a little and Littles wear diapers in the DD. Katherine is a big, and in the DD bigs are the people doing the diapering.

“ James and Katherine could work out to be great parents! The only question though is will they continue to be parents for Dawn?” That’s a great question, from their levity shown to date and Dawn’s behaviour clearly they have a lot to learn from the parent rule book. The doctor h weighing her in a baby scale clearly things she is still small enough to be a baby rather than the toddle James and Katherine are treating her like. The LPS report and James responses to the enrolment forms may end up delivering two very different views on where she the grown ups should be in this dimension. Quietly hoping that she is taken away from James and Katherine to reposition her expectations, even if she ends up back with them longterm. Then there is Katherine’s Mom, apart from a phone call we have not seen anything of her yet and a Grandmother who has grandbaby fever would be disastrous for Dawn.

Unless it's requested of me, I don't typically write the "mom" figure in diapers. And by that, I mean someone who is posing as the authority figure in the story (I guess Katherine is in that role, in this case). I guess that's where I'm a little naive. Since it's not something I immediately take to, I'm not sure what the exact appeal might be, and thus it can be harder for me to make the most of it or hit it from the right angles. If you'd ever like to explain, please broaden my horizons!

I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one coming up with crazy ideas for you to write. ;)

Glad Kyle was received well! As for the "twins," at the moment, there's nothing necessarily conclusive about them, so come to your own conclusions on that. There are "tamer" ways to interpret it, and some other a tad bit more twisted! So assuming there's never any tangent or side story, it's totally up to you! Though, what I will say is the idea for them came from another commission that's been requested. Still in the pipeline, but if it goes through, it'll follow the idea of an Amazon who wants triplets, but through the way of Littles, natural triplets can be a bit difficult to find... Three cheers for nanite cosmetics... Body horror makes me the most squeamish, so it hits that nerve in a fun/exciting way for me haha

Referring to the “twins” I did get a mother and daughter vibe from them. I always love the idea of a mother in diapers, but you know all about that lol.

Guilend

The keyboard would be far too big for her and she could get hurt or get on very naughty websites. Honestly I don’t know why I said diapered maid. I wrote in the moment because I couldn’t think of anything else to write lol I really am on the fence with James. I sort of see his point of view and then he does or says something that just blows my mind. Typical Amazon

Guilend

Thank you for writing a good story!

The length of the chapter didn’t bother me. I did notice there were 2 parts the before appointment and appointment itself. But the length and content from what I figure are usually up to the author!

Nicely done. You made Kyle a very well written character to explain this Dimension to Dawn while making him seem more like a person and less like an information kiosk. XD The little hints of backstory were nice, especially his wife turned sister still arguing with him. I got that "married couple" vibe before he even said anything about their relationship. Oh, which reminds me... who were the "twins" that you briefly mentioned? Did you pull an Ausdpr and make a mother and daughter "twins" or something?

Yes, that was me. Thanks for the kind words!

FatherFish

I get that. It just with the cliff hanger were James and Katherine were like don't forget to talk to the doctor about those things. I took that as a foreshadowing and predicted some simple modification would happen during the visit. I'm glad it didn't, not every day this type of story surprises the reader. Iv been around for a while reading these kind of stories I only comment every once in a decade or so. Just saying this story is a masterpiece in the works. Same with sheltered.

You guys are so lucky Dawn's not allowed to used a computer to read this stuff... In all seriousness, the spiraling rabbit hole seems to continue! A diapered maid, huh? Interesting! I'm hoping to give James a little bit more spotlight, and being mindful of pacing my hope it so give him one more solid chapter to give some more insight on who he is and how he rolls. Thanks for reading and enjoying!

If that's really just as judgment call the doctor can make on interaction alone, at least based on how Dawn's been handled and how she's reacted, I can't imagine her developmental age would be one-to-one with her biological. At least for something like a car seat, since that's more of a physical thing, I do want to lend credibility in a way to the "science" of my take on DD, which is going to make those recommendations more based on her size, and even if she's throwing "tantrums," those are an "expected" thing from kids and shouldn't affect a change in seating more than it already has. Thanks for reading and commenting!

My problem with writing these stories is trying to cover so many bases, haha. The chapter got so big that I decided it'd be better to extend the first doctor's visit and cover some more ground that way. As I wrote James into the situation I kind of realized that Katherine's been more of the primary guardian lately, so it'd make more sense to include her before anything substantial is talked about or things are done. So call it an unintentional tease, haha. I love the babying moments as much as everyone, but I think wanting to create a tiny bit more build-up and establishing a chain of logic is what I try to prioritize, because that way I think those moments hit a bit harder. Haha, glad you enjoyed it, though! Thank you very much!

Doctor's is over, so that means a good day for the remainder, right? At the rate things are going, I could definitely see Dawn needing a real shoulder to lean on or talk to, but given her options and limited resources, I don't know if something like that really exists... Another concept I sort of tried to introduce is that this is a point in the DD where portal technology seems to be fairly new. The concept of portal Littles is only just a couple or few years old, so it's a question of whether specialized resources for portal Littles really exist in this place at all. I'm sure Katherine's going to be eager to do all she can to help Dawn, and as the one with the most experience in watching her, she'll definitely have a treasure trove of opinions to give... As an author's note, because the scope of the chapter was getting far too big, that's why I decided to do a second appointment. It's a way to include Katherine as well. No telling what's going on with the LPS investigation until the bombshell drops, so it's a wait and see. Thank you so much for reading and commenting!

This I could certainly see happening. Though, I could see James and Katherine just maybe deflecting at least partially by saying it's something already up in the air. Though, just mentioning stuff seems to set Dawn off. Kind of rightfully so? Thanks for commenting!

Poor Dawn, she’s totally TRAPPED. hehe. I can’t wait to see what happens next and who she’ll see next. My Monopoly money is on a diapered maid. Maybe I’ll go as one at Halloween hehe

Guilend

Admittedly, I feel like every chapter there's something new Dawn's learned to hate, or a new negative experience or feeling to tack onto her situation... I think Kyle's use is pretty obvious, but he's finally the first real look at this world through a Dawn-oriented kind of bias. Dr. Wexler can be viewed a few different ways, but I wanted to present her as another "good" Amazon. Wanting the best for Littles, but trying to achieve that through misguided views. The only issue though is she's in a society with an official degree and status that gives her the kind of credibility Dawn could never hope to compete against. Reacting to Dawn's confession that way can be interpreted a few different ways, but as a broad stroke answer I'd say it falls in line with her personality to never really be caught off guard by Littles. That being said, there's a few different ways to possibly explain why she reacted the way she did. James is trying! Though I think he's got some bridge-building to do with Dawn if he hopes to do more than just coexist. Even if he's just a product of his world, Dawn's not considerate enough to fully recognize and be influenced by that. Even if he didn't do something to her directly, by association is enough to hold ill will. Haha, but I guess with a little bit of soft and stern, James and Katherine could work out to be great parents! The only question though is will they continue to be parents for Dawn? Stay tuned! Thanks so much for the comment, and also if you run by the same name on DD I read your short "Sketch Artist" the other day. Fun read! Loved the mindset you put the MC into with creating the illustration!

Glad you enjoyed it! I never wanted to do an information dump, and I still wouldn't fully consider this one, but I felt the need or thought it might be fun to finally give Dawn just a little bit more insight on her situation. Ultimately though it's whatever she makes of it. Also, let's try not to use the 'T' word around Dawn... I think saying she's trapped might really snap her mind in two... And also, nothing's set in stone! It definitely is cruel with how things are playing out, but I'm under the assumption that James and Katherine still have honest intentions, even if they themselves doubt what can really be done... Thanks so much for reading and commenting!

Brilliant chapter, I wonder how old the doctor has her at now, might be time to reassess the car seat, she probably needs a carrier rear facing. Looking forward to seeing how she adapts to her new life

That was really good. It was a tease though. It eluded to everything that could of happened but didn't, and set up for something to happen later. I was expecting at least 1 alteration like body hair removal. It's good that it wasn't predictable with the protagonist thought, best stories are that way. You keep me wanting more and more. For a one off short story intstant gratification is good but not for a story like this. I think you turned a hugely anticipated chapter into the perfect example how to do things 15/10 off the charts thank you.

I look forward to the conversation and the rest of Dawn’s day with James. Likely not going to be the most pleasant. Dawn certainly needs some therapy or daycare or something to that nature. I do wonder how the additional appointment will go including temperatures and shots. Or asking about bathroom habits. So after the LPS investigation I wonder if they will basically seal the adoption automatically once the investigation is finished and a decision has been made. Great chapter!

Just a thought, maybe the Doctor could recommend that they enroll Dawn in a Daycare to help with her adjustment...

Eberhardt85

This chapter feels really important for Dawn's character. Before her attitude was shaped by life become coming through the portal, and her reactions were perfectly reasonable. But her trip kept taking unexpected turns, and she has seen and experienced enough of this world to allow for critical thinking. I think Dawn really needed someone like Kyle to give her that reality check. Plus, Dr. Wexler's reaction to her confession should have raised a few flags in her head, since she's not doubt heard similar pleas from other Littles. All the pieces are there are for everything to click into place for Dawn. The only question now is whether Dawn reexamines her situation or doubles down on her current stance. James also got to shine in this chapter. He's the stern, less patient parent. A softer side is there, but he is noticeably quicker to enforce his status as her guardian, and more firmly believe that he knows best. Between him and Katherine, Dawn has a very stable household. I can't help but wonder what answers he put on Dawn's medical chart. Especially her development age.

FatherFish

Nice chapter! I think some cracks are starting to appear in reality for Dawn though. She's probably going to break down hard when she figures out just how trapped she really is. They really need to stop this idea of getting her home, I think it's crueller than her knowing she's never going to leave.

babysofia1234