I unlocked a new skill!! π₯ NECKPIT FARTING π€£π€£π€£
I unlocked a new skill!! π₯ NECKPIT FARTING π€£π€£π€£
2021-06-28 16:56:01 +0000 UTC View Post
I unlocked a new skill!! π₯ NECKPIT FARTING π€£π€£π€£
2021-06-28 16:56:01 +0000 UTC View PostEat lots of viscous veggies, and one day, you'll grow eyeballs and a mustache just like mine. God told me, so it has to be true. π
2021-04-19 21:27:04 +0000 UTC View PostSome extra crispy fetish sucking for to help with that drip drip drip ππ¦π€£
2021-04-19 14:25:19 +0000 UTC View PostBaby pigeons are fucking terrifying, and they just won't leave me alone this season, what GIVES?
2021-04-19 02:12:39 +0000 UTC View PostMy official stance is questionable at best. Please refrain from further investigation.
2021-04-18 19:05:42 +0000 UTC View PostMy lips are a portal to another dimension where everyone is a different version of Jesus. My favorite is the Jesus who only wears a zebra print thong speedo, flame style pasties, a hot pink sequin fedora, and rhinestone cowboy boots. He's my favorite because he is, by far, the most serious about spreading the gospel. There is a whole group of Jesuses who wear tacky, floral print, ankle length dresses with gaudy sun hats, and honestly, I just can't with them. I doubt they take the gospel seriousl...
2021-04-18 14:31:03 +0000 UTC View PostSLUGS SLUGS I LOVE SLUGS IM ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY WILD ABOUT SLUGS!!!
2021-03-25 17:24:29 +0000 UTC View PostIt's amazing to me how much fat my knees accumulate π For real though, even when I was super skinny, I always had weird fat deposits on my knees and now my knees are legit chonk hahahaha I've also always had strangely chonk ankles even when I was skinny. I used to say "I'm the skinniest person you'll ever mβ¬β¬t with cankles" and people agreed when they saw them in person, they were legit cankles... Now I'm over here thinking shit like "these twice baked potatoes with extra sour cream are g...
2021-03-25 17:20:34 +0000 UTC View PostYou truly wouldn't believe the shit he has to put up with... πΎππΎ @moltenc0re
2021-03-25 16:52:44 +0000 UTC View PostEntirely reasonable butt flap stuff
2021-03-25 01:20:43 +0000 UTC View PostIT'S ALMOST JESUS DAY βοΈ MY TONGUE IS EXCITED AS FUUUUCK π CHICKIE CHICKIE π₯
2021-03-24 18:42:24 +0000 UTC View PostRECIPE TIIIIIIIIIME π€€π God's OG Tom Yum Soup It was a hot, summer night, and the snowflakes looked like fried eggs as they glistened on the sidewalk. I was walking faster than usual for no particular reason, and the air was lingering on every cell of my body as it blew past me. I thought to myself, "Wow, this is such neat pavement," and smiled approvingly. Everything smelled like cardamom and blue Gatorade. How nice. As I entered the forest, a small acorn started rolling along beside me...
2021-03-16 13:00:03 +0000 UTC View PostExtraterrestrial swamp goblin titties for Jehovah! What have you offered the Almighty lately? Share your stories below, and God will give you a gold star!!! π
2021-03-15 20:21:26 +0000 UTC View PostYou heard me right!! π’ Less than fiftβ¬en minutes β³ of terrorists π« communists π₯ cannon balls π£ clowns π€‘ aliens π½ lovely douchebags πΉ russian spies π the world's slowest refrigerator π§ cyborgs π¦Ύ space pirates π΄ββ οΈ cucumber muffins π₯ and at risk of seeming narcissistic π GREAT WORK ME π
2021-03-15 00:57:50 +0000 UTC View PostElite choreography π₯΅π₯΅π₯΅ (no music because the only sounds I need are the voices in my head)
2021-03-11 00:34:45 +0000 UTC View PostKissing queen champion supreme π«π«π§ π
2021-03-11 00:32:55 +0000 UTC View PostI'm not a "hot mess" pfffttt I'm a "Saint" ππ
2021-03-09 20:06:45 +0000 UTC View PostConcentration is key πͺπ #nevergiveup #neverbackdown #competitivekissing #kissingwarmups #kissingpractice #determination #endurancekissing
2021-03-09 17:37:31 +0000 UTC View PostImportant meme straight from our personal Lord and Savior π
2021-03-04 21:40:52 +0000 UTC View PostYou can save thousands on your car insurance loans simply by switching to Christ π
2021-03-01 19:33:48 +0000 UTC View PostGot caught doing weird shit in my dumpster nest again... π€ You win a prize if you can guess what I was doing! π
2021-03-01 19:31:25 +0000 UTC View PostThis is the kind of shit that happens when I try to "be creative" bwahaha
2021-03-01 19:24:20 +0000 UTC View PostTook a nice winter walk with the Holy Ghost by my side, today π I spent some time connecting with the snow bugs and praying to our lord the father next to this GOBLIN SPIRIT STICK TOTEM POLE OF WONDER π± I could really feel it amplifying my devotion to sky daddyyyyyy Also, Jesus made my nipples hard again hehe π₯° I fall in love more and more everyday π PRAISE BE π
2021-02-28 21:46:07 +0000 UTC View PostEpisode 1: God Loves This, He Told Me π In which I instruct on proper prayer practices, discuss how your nipples can help you have a closer relationship with Jesus, and sing you a sexy little song πΆ
2021-02-27 17:42:43 +0000 UTC View Post